Agents Of Noir...

"I'm guessing this is Dax's little hidey hole." 

We had no idea where we were. To the left of us was a desk with a small, white lamp lying on its side. To the right, a dresser with the majority of the clothes strewn on the floor. Behind us was a four post bed with the sheets and blankets rolled beneath a yellow pillow. 

"From the looks of it, whoever was here left in a hurry." I whispered.

"If we're in the right place," Toilyn said, surveying the clothes. She picked up a sweatshirt and sniffed it. She scrunched up her nose. "Luminous has a lot of explaining to do."

"What's that face? It smells?"

She tossed the shirt aside to rummage through the rest. "No. I mean, come on, Z… We don't live at Luminous." She held up a pair of pants. "For the bad guys, they sure are hospitable."

I continued to watch the door while she stalked through what could end up not even being Dax's possessions. "They make sure their agents are comfortable." I said quietly. "The more comfortable you become, be the situation good or bad, right or wrong, the human mind will cling to what we know. Comfort zones are in our nature. We can't help it."

"So you're saying defecting is in our nature?"

"You honestly want me to believe that you, of all people, have never thought about it?" I shrugged though her back was still turned to me. "I can only speak for myself, but when I considered the idea, it was because Noir made so much sense. Not only that, it seemed so much easier. They basically do whatever, whenever, no consequences. For an amount of time that I'm not even comfortable admitting to, I felt like a prisoner of this job. I wanted to do whatever I wanted, consequences be damned. It wasn't until…" I paused. Brie.

Toilyn threw me a quick glance over her shoulder before returning to her task. "Brie… Right?" 

"Right." I replied to her slouched form. "After all of that, I wanted to blame Dax, blame Noir… Blame anybody and everybody but the person who caused all of it and it was getting harder and harder to face her in the mirror." I sighed. "Truth is, by the time I accepted my part in it, too much time had passed and Brie was already a higher up in Noir. More than anything, I just wanted to apologize for bringing her back. I wanted to tell her not only had I accepted that this was my fault, I wanted her to know that never again would I put someone else on the line for my own interests." My voice cracked. Despite my best efforts, my eyes were trying to tear up. "I wanted her to know that I put all that selfishness behind me, that I really had changed."

"Yes." Toilyn turned so that she sat Indian style across from me. 

I brushed the vulnerability from my cheeks. Toilyn was the only one allowed to know that side of me. Never again would I risk someone catching even a partial glimpse into my soul. "Yes what?"

"I've thought about defecting in the past." She fiddled with the flooring between her knees. "I changed my mind after I found something worth sticking around for." 

"What was that?" 

"You, Z." She slapped the floor. "Dammit, I stayed for you, okay?"

"Me?"

"You're my best friend, my family. If that's not worth seeing this through to the end, what is?"

Throughout time, space and all that was in between, no matter what, we always chose each other. Us before them. Us before Luminous. Almost at the same time, we both reached to wipe stray tears from our eyes. 

"I love you, Toy." 

"I love… Wait a second, what's that?"

So much for mush. "What?" 

She jabbed her finger at the bed. "Right there. Under the bed." She crawled to reach under the bed. "Right… There. Here, get this." She waved a cracked picture frame back at me. "There's something else." She sat up, straining to pull something free. "Little help?" I tossed the frame on the bed to lend a hand. Together, we dragged a large, vintage looking trunk from beneath the bed. She hopped to her feet. I don't know what she was about to say, but instead, her eyes clouded over. "Uh, Z?" 

I looked up from the trunk. "What?" 

"Did you look at that picture?"

"No." Was I supposed to?

"It's Jan." She said.

Though I heard her perfectly, my brain didn't compute. "Huh?"

"The picture." She snatched it off the bed to hand to me. "It's Jan." 

My jaw dropped. "Where are we?" In frame was Jan and a girl, in what appeared to be her early twenties. Her lips were curved into a pinched smile, as if someone had to beg for its presence. His face was completely blank. Gone was the sarcastic confidence that we'd come to know. Neither of them looked particularly comfortable. It was just that, a picture, and they just happened to be in it. I dropped the frame on the floor to stamp the glass free.

"What are you doing?"

"What if this means something?"

"It means that guy is definitely single." Toilyn smirked. "Or he was after they took that pic. Those two have zero chemistry."

I almost threw the glass at her. Almost. Instead, I plucked the photo free then shoved it in my back pocket. 

"Why are you keeping that?" Toilyn's eyes narrowed as if she could see the photo through my jeans. "You know what? Nevermind." She leaned down, disguising her annoyance within a heavy sigh. "Help me lift this on the bed."

I took my place on the other end of the trunk. "Ready?" When our eyes met, I nodded. "3… 2… Lift."

We hoisted it from the floor. "It definitely didn't feel this light when we were dragging it." Toilyn muttered, attempting to lift the lid. "Figures. Locked." Her eyes scanned the room before going back to the keyhole. "Do you still have that weird looking key from that stuff that jerk off gave us?" 

"Why would he have a key to…" I thought about it. "Here? Wherever here is." I fished around my pockets. If I still had that key after everything, it would be a miracle. Finally, my fingers brushed across the brass. "I one hundred percent legit doubt…" I began, watching her slide it in the keyhole. To both our surprise, we heard a click. "I stand corrected."

"Keep an eye on the door." She hissed, throwing open the lid. "On second thought…"

I was already beside her. "What is this stuff?" So many colors. The amount of OCD it had to take… The clothes were color coordinated, folded so neatly that the creases were sharp enough to cut glass. Pants and shirts. Sweaters and shorts. On top of it all, placed directly in the middle, was a rolled up poster looking thing alongside an envelope. 

Toilyn selected the rolled up paper. "I'm starting to think this isn't Dax's hidey hole… These are floor plans." She spread the poster across the nearest empty swatch of bed. "Why are floor plans stuffed underneath somebody's bed?" She asked, smoothing the edges so it would stop rolling back up. 

"Hold on, I think this a letter." 

Toilyn glanced up from the plans. "Man, the last time somebody snatched up a letter…" 

"So you're saying I shouldn't?"

"Oh no, no, no. We're royally jacked anyway. What else could happen?"

I held the envelope up to the light. One thing I knew for sure was it wasn't a bomb, but that was about it. I tore at the edges. Instantly, I recognized the handwriting from the college. "Dr. Patil wrote this." I told Toilyn. If eyes could roll free from their sockets, she would have been an expert. 

"Ugh… I'm tired of this fool. What?"

"If you're reading this, I'm either in hiding or I'm already dead."

"Hopefully the latter."

"Shhhh. Hold up a sec." I cleared my throat. "In this chest you will find the floor plans of Noir Corporation. I acquired them from one of their agents, Dax." 

"That would explain why Dax was here… Wherever this is. Does it happen to say how he managed to get these from Dax?" She tapped her chin with an index finger. "I just can't imagine Dr. Busy Body winning a fight against that guy."

"Shhhh."

"You're going to shush me one more time…"

"Toilyn…" I groaned. It's not like she was paying attention. I started scanning ahead. 

"Fine, fine." She held up her hands in surrender. "What else does he have to say for himself?"

"I'm guessing this trunk is supposed to be some sort of apology."

"How? There's no way this is his stuff." Toilyn started sifting through the clothes. "These are women's clothes." 

"Oh?" I looked up. She was dangling a dress over the trunk. "Oh."

"None of this makes sense." She said, dropping it. "Is there anything useful in there?"

I shrugged. There wasn't much. "It says he didn't know his involvement would cause as much trouble as it has. Not only did they threaten him, they manipulated him by not disclosing how intricate this job can be."

"He's no victim." Toilyn scoffed. "All I'm hearing is that letter says exactly what he was blubbering about that night. So what."

I waved off her irritations. "I think this was Jan's assistant's dorm."

"Um, whatsherface… M name, right?"

"Her name was Mavis."

"I was close." Not even a little. "What makes you sure?"

"Call it a hunch."

"I doubt it." Toilyn said.

"It would explain the clothes." 

"Or the good doctor moonlights as a drag queen. How much does a professor make anyway?" When I didn't respond, she sighed. "Come on Z, why would the good doctor be hanging around some chick's dorm? That's a little creepy."

She had a point. "Because nobody would check the dorm of a dead girl."

"Hello? Dax was just here."

Another solid point and yet, I was right. I was sure of it. It would explain so much. He'd made it a point to tell us she was a former student of his. On the one hand, it could have easily been small talk, but what if it wasn't? What if it was a crucial detail, meant to lead us to the place that we were now standing in by sheer chance? 

Only one way to find out. "Let's go." 

"Go?" Toilyn looked on, confused. "Go where?"

"What do you mean? Toilyn, this has longitude and latitude." 

"And I have zero patience. That doesn't tell me squat." 

"No, no. The floor plans." I pointed at the plans excitedly. "We can get into Noir!"

"How?"

Sometimes she was so… So… I typed the coordinates into my goggles in order to show them to her. She nodded, finally understanding. "Oh. Okay, okay. Longitude and latitude."

Really? I shoved her shoulder playfully. "You're so full of shit sometimes. You know that, right?"

She shoved me back. "Stop trying to act like you don't like it." 

 

******

"I really, really don't like this." 

From the looks of it, we were in a boiler room of some sort. Toilyn scanned our surroundings before nodding that we were indeed, alone. "No time for chitchat. There's no telling where they've stashed Jan." She pointed to the left of us. "We've made it this far. Ugh… I wish I'd brought my gear now." 

"It's too bulky."

"Well, it's now or never. What's it going to be?"

"We've gotta save-"

"Jan. I know, I know. Enough already."

Neither of us had the stomach to digest the fact that we could be on a mission to retrieve a body. The truth of the matter hung in the air, wafting over our skin, lest we forget and that was heavy enough.

Toilyn peeked out of the boiler room door. "All clear." She pushed the door open. 

"You there!"

All clear, huh? She was down the hall before I could react. She wrapped her hands around his face. SNAP! Even from where I was standing, I could hear the faint click of his esophagus as his neck broke. She started dragging him towards me. I reopened the door so that she could stash him. 

"You said all clear…" I muttered.

"This is a long, dark hallway." She grinned. "Let's go."

"I'm so glad you're enjoying this."

"Oh no, if I'm dying today, I'm going to have some fun first." 

I fell in step behind her. We came up on another door. She grabbed the knob. "Alright, you ready?"

I nodded. "Ready." She jerked it open. I threw myself in front of her, hands at the ready. "Clear."

"I'm guessing there's an elevator somewhere down here." Toilyn said.

"We wouldn't be able to take it anyway." Duh. "Come on." I started up the stairs, this time with her flanking me. At each floor, we would risk a glance. We were surrounded by Noir. 

"We're going to have to blend in somehow." I said on the sixth floor. "If Jan is here, this would be the floor." Neither of us understood how to read the blueprints but I did understand that the sixth floor hardly had any surrounding rooms. It had to mean something. Toilyn didn't like the idea, but the longer we debated it, the more it became clear that we really didn't have much of a plan so the sixteenth floor was the plan. 

She pointed at my belt. "The goggles. Switch your goggles with Dax's and I'll take mine off." 

Noir's goggles were solid gold. They were hard to miss, even in a fight. The toggles and switches were a stark contrast to Luminous' black and bronze. I switched mine out with Dax's. 

"How do I look?"

"Like this is already a bad idea."

"So, on theme? Perfect." 

"Ah ha. Ah ha." 

I opened the door ahead of her. A couple agents waved at us absently. I waved back.

Toilyn grabbed my hand. "What are you doing?"

"Blending in." Every face was smiling and either waving or nodding. I didn't know this version of Noir. I lowered my voice. "Fix your face. You can read the distrust off your eyebrows." 

"Um…" Toilyn's expression folded into a bright, friendly smile. 

"Hi, you guys." 

Uh oh. I almost stopped breathing. He approached us quickly. Instead of engaging in conversation, he said "Excuse me." And kept going. I exhaled the breath of air I'd been holding. "Toy, my arm." Her fingers had nudged a scarlet pattern in the skin.  

"Huh? Oh." 

"Relax." I whispered. 

I led us through the swarm of agents, each smiling. Each nodding. Each welcoming. In their eyes, we were one of their own. 

Finally, I paused in front of a set of double doors. "If I remember correctly, he should be around this area." 

Toilyn threw a few more agents a hasty smile. "Don't you think there are too many agents for those blueprints?" 

"What do you mean?"

"The floor we were looking at didn't have many rooms and this one is swarming with Noir." 

"Blueprints don't show people, Toy." I replied, though I was already having the same feeling. "He's here." Again, I inhaled a deep breath. He has to be. 

Exhaling, I pushed the silver panel. Empty. It looked to be some sort of lab.

"Toy…"

"Shhhh. Shhhh. Close the door behind us." 

Frantically, we began searching for something, anything. We threw open every cabinet, every previously unopened door. I shook my head in defeat. "Nothing."

"There are two more rooms with doors like this one." She didn't speak further, but I could hear the doubt in her voice. 

Thankful for the lack of "I told you so", I followed her back to the doors.

"Come on, we can-"

"Wait a second, what's that?"

"What?" Toilyn braced herself, same as we always had.

"No, no, there. Over there." I pointed to several buttons poking from beneath a shelf. "Over there. Under that shelf." The closer Toilyn got, the more I understood exactly what we were looking at. I clapped my hands over my mouth. "It's… Toy, no… Toy, no…"

It was Jan's remote. It was broken in four places but still recognizable.

"This doesn't mean anything, Z." She picked up the pieces. The face plate for coordinates was cracked. When she lifted it, it started to flash the last set, the last place he ever was: The doctor's home.

"Why did we come here?" My voice cracked with unshed tears. 

"Because he's here." She grabbed the latch on my belt. "Where are those plans?" 

"Back pocket." I mumbled, handing them to her.

She unfolded them on the nearest countertop. After a few seconds, she muttered something that sounded a lot like "That explains all the agents."

"What?"

"Ugh… Z, we're on the wrong floor."

"No we're not."

"Come here." 

I leaned across her shoulder. From this angle, I could clearly see that we were supposed to be on floor 9. Not 6. Rookie mistake. 

She refolded the plan. "Howsabout I hold on to this?" She tucked it away without waiting for a response. I knew she wanted to say something else but again, was choosing not to. Probably "You idiot!" or "How could you be so stupid?!" or "So you're telling me you couldn't tell you were looking at it upside down?!?!?!" Whatever thoughts were jogging through her mind, her lips remained closed as she turned on her heels. "Let's go." Was all she offered. 

Again, we were wading through the murky sea of Noir agents. Each a face of welcoming and trust. The Noir we were being presented with was not the Noir either of us had come to know. It was jarring each time somebody greeted us. 

Once we were inside the stairwell again, I asked Toilyn was her silence because she was mad at me. 

"No." She assured me. "I'm just worried about you. Let's face it: That's something I would do and we would just laugh and laugh because I'm the screw up. You're supposed to have it together." 

"I'm freaking out about-"

"Jan." She interrupted. "I'm starting to think this is less about him and more about you." 

"What do you mean?" 

"You have always blamed yourself for the Brie thing. You know what I think? I think in your eyes, if we don't get him back, it's another scratch in your book of life and this one would mean more because he saved not just your life… But mine." 

"Toy… I'm glad he saved you."

"Oh no, I know. But come on, save two damsels in distress, die in Noir. Nobody deserves that. Especially not Jan."

"Especially?" Despite our circumstances, a smile crept across my face. 

"What can I say? He's grown on me." She sighed. "I need you to get your head in the game, Z. I don't know what's up there but I do know that there's only two of us to fight it. Me and you, right?" She looked back at me.

I nodded. "You and me."

"Besides, it's not like it was a total bust." She patted the lumps from the remote in her right pocket. "Either he or someone dealing with him was in that room."

I knew she was trying to help, but it was having the opposite effect. 

"You're going to drive yourself crazy with all that worrying." She poked my cheek. "Do you want to hear a stupid idea?"  

"You know how I adore a good ol' fashion stupid idea." I said sarcastically.

"Hear me out." She jabbed a finger at my head. "We made it all the way down here with just those goggles. Why not risk the elevator?"

"Oh yeah, that really is stupid." I answered. "What's wrong with the stairs?"

"Nothing. It's just," She shrugged. "If we don't hurry up, we're going to run out of time." She opened the door to look out. "Come on."

With anxiety doing everything it could to glue my feet to the floor, I followed her out. As we carved our way down the hall, my mind was reeling. What I really couldn't wrap my head around was why Luminous was so hell bent on leaving Jan behind. As far back as I could remember, we weren't allowed to risk civilian lives, ESPECIALLY if Noir was involved. What made Jan different? From what I gathered, Luminous had eyes on Jan in his timeline from the beginning, probably because of his research. Bateman had been tracking him for a while but not to bring him in. Instead he was only keeping an eye on him. The real question was: Why? What was I missing? Jan was obviously a cog in an even bigger machine, but why?

"Hello."

"Hi."

"Hey."

Wave. Wave. Wave.

More warm expressions and greetings. This time, Toilyn did all the smiling and nodding. Noticeably, there were less smiles in the mix. A few faces were folded with tension. Several goggles were disappearing into rooms, speaking in hushed tones. Finally, she nudged me. The elevator was opening. Noir agents, these more focused and tense, scurried past. My gaze bounced after them. That's weird. Outside of a faint "Excuse me," they barely acknowledged us. 

The door was closing when a hand appeared, stopping the door from closing. The Noir agent noted us. First Toilyn, then me. Her gaze stayed on me longer. I shifted uncomfortably. Her eyes scanned mine as if she was searching for something. Suddenly they widened in recognition. Toilyn jumped on her before she could cry out. She attempted to break free, but Toilyn was faster. SNAP! She was placing her in a sitting position when the alarm sounded. 

Both of our mouths fell open. The elevator screeched to a halt as red lights started to flash from the walls. 

"This can't be good!" I shouted over the alarms. 

"Oh, you think?!" Toilyn shouted back.

"What-" my "are we going to do?" was swallowed by "Agents of Noir…" The voice that was vibrating from the ceiling was one I knew all too well. "Our base has been infiltrated by Luminous agents." 

Dax. "It's Dax!" 

"Just great!"

"Now what?!"

He was in the middle of describing Toilyn and I right down to our bootstraps. "Approach with extreme prejudice. Shoot on sight." 

The alarms felt as if they were growing louder by the second. The elevator sprang back to life. "Get ready!" Toilyn warned at the same time as Ding! The elevator doors opened on Floor 9. Two sets of eyes fell on us. No time for pleasantries. I threw my hands to the left of me. The blast reflected off the glass window, knocking out both agents. 

Toilyn smirked. "So, no more smiling and nodding?!" For the first time since our paths had crossed, one of us was pushing the red jewel. I had no idea what it did but for how confident she was when she slapped her palm on it, Toylin knew exactly what it did. 

"Check every floor, every room! Luminous has infiltrated Noir!"

Red and white siren lights echoed up the hallway. "We need to secure the floor!" Toilyn turned to me. "I've got this! Go find him!"

"I'm not leaving you!" I shouted over the chaos.

"There's no telling how many more are up here! I'm right behind you! I promise!" She shouted back, pushing me. "Go, Z! GO!"

With one last nod, I took off to the left of her. I froze at a familiar hue. It can't be. Slithering through the red and white was a low hum of blue and gold flickering on the wall in the middle of the hall. It has to be. I rushed to the window. It is. I gasped and backed up a few steps, covering my mouth. Jan.

Tears flooded the brims of my eyes. I blinked them back, blurring everything but not enough that I couldn't make him out in the middle of the floor. Bound to some sort of hook, made noticeable by the surrounding blue and gold emanating the walls like a candle wick, was Jan. I tried the door. Locked. Of course it is. I shook the handle again. "Jan!" I slapped my hands on the glass, screaming though I knew he couldn't hear and even if he could, the alarms were swallowing my words, snatching them out of reach. 

I wiped my eyes. "Dammit! Think, Z! Think!" 

At the end of the hall was another set of doors. I'll be right back. I promise. I nodded at the glass before rushing to them. Locked. I screamed in frustration. This was not supposed to be happening. I scrambled down the hallways, twisting the knobs on each room, all locked. There weren't a lot, but in my frenzy, it felt like hundreds. 

By another elevator, I found a closet, fully expecting another locked door. I will never be able to express how relieved I felt when it clicked. I flung the door open. Frantically, I pushed the brooms and mops behind me. As I was shoving the third set of buckets out of the way, I noticed a rustic shimmer in the corner. I jumped over a bin of cleaning supplies for a closer look. I knew I was making too much noise, but there was no time. Noir already knew we were there; is what I kept screaming mentally. We are out of time! I noted a triangular base of wheels. I grabbed the base and pulled. At first, it wouldn't budge. Of course not. I pulled once more, gritting my teeth. I barely stumbled backwards just in time for a stack of bins to topple out of the way, revealing a chair. 

Yes! Yes! Yes!

I rolled the chair back to the blue and gold wall. With each step, I whispered a prayer under my breath. Please let this thing be heavy enough. Please…

I approached the blue with caution. Not once had I checked my surroundings. What was I thinking? Moreover, where was Toilyn? I chanced a quick glance behind me before stopping at the glass. I placed one hand on either side of the chair. A few flakes of rust crumbled onto my fingers. 

Okay, Z… You've got this…

1… Totally. I've got this. 2… 

THREE

With every ounce of strength I could scrape together, I lifted the chair and launched it at the window. It shattered beneath the weight, echoing the presence of an intruder. I didn't have time to worry about how far the sound carried. I knocked the rest of the glass out of the way so that I could climb through. 

Now closer, I could see that his chest was bare and there were bloody streaks on his skin. I checked around him, just in case. 

"Jan…" His head snapped up suddenly. His sockets reflected gold across my skin. 

"Z…" He whispered. I reached to touch his cheek. I mean, he was alive. Before my hand could connect, his head dropped again. 

Shit. I grabbed him around the waist and pulled. As soon as my fingers touched him, the glow grew brighter, stronger, almost blindingly so.

"Z?!"

"I'm in here!" 

"Z?!" 

"Here, Toilyn! HERE!"

My eyes were squeezed shut against Jan's chest. I couldn't see. "Toilyn?!" 

"I'm here! Holy shit, what is this?!"

"It's Jan! Help me, Toy!"

"Back away from him!"

"What?! Why?!"

"Dammit, Z… DUCK!" 

I dropped to the floor beside Jan's bare feet. He fell backwards onto the linoleum. The glowing ceased immediately. 

"What did you do?!"

"No time! Grab his other side! I cleared the floor but I'm sure they've figured out we're here for him!"

Four agents appeared in the now glassless window. 

"Toilyn!" I was on my feet before they could climb all the way through. 

She whirled her hands in a circle. As the fourth boot was entering, she screamed. A bright red, even brighter than the alarm filled the room. She held her position, both palms up. When she finally lowered her hands, ash and dust swirled across the room. 

"Grab him." She all but snarled at me. 

She jammed coordinates into her goggles. I did the same. Knelt on the cold floor, Toilyn warned me not to lift. Both of us slung one of Jan's arms over our shoulders.

"NOW!"

Agents Of Revelations...

For four days, we took turns playing look out while Jan slept. Every time his body would stir, the glow would return. It didn't work when Toilyn tried, but for me, when I would touch him, the blue and gold would calm itself, once again out of sight, but never out of mind.

"What's that all about?" She'd questioned on the second night. 

I removed my hand from Jan's chest to turn to her. "What?"

"He wasn't a traffic light last we saw him unless I missed something." 

I shrugged. I had as much understanding as she did: None. 

"You should get some sleep." Toilyn advised as I followed her down the stairs. Again, we were huddled inside the doctor's home. Not the best plan, but at the moment, our only plan. We had no idea what was going on at Luminous. There weren't many available options. 

"Hey, what's that look?" Toilyn waved her hand in front of my face. "Cheer up. We're still alive."

"For now." I replied, throwing my legs over the arm of the loveseat. 

Toilyn settled across from me on the couch. "It's been three days."

Exactly. I thought, rolling everything through my mind like a tumbleweed. It felt as if we'd been in this forever, but only a small amount of time had passed. In three days, how were we still alive?

"You never explained what happened back there." I said, changing the subject. "At Noir."

"Which part?" 

I mimicked how she'd held up her palms in the lab.

"So you're saying you've never pushed the red jewel?" She tapped hers with the nail on her middle finger. 

"Obviously." 

She fiddled with the lace on her bracelet. "It's a kill switch. Ashes everything the beam touches. Well, no. That's not quite accurate. I think our moods control it because I've used it to subdue a few agents without actually killing them." She tilted her head thoughtfully. "I'm sure they wished I had though. It's never pretty."

"Is that why your record at Luminous is so long?"

She continued to fiddle with the lace, now guiltily. "I don't use it often, but it has gotten me out of a lot of tight spots." She smiled thoughtfully. "Since Jan messed with yours, it probably spits out roses or some shit now."

Jan… Somehow all conversations led back to him. I turned my nose upwards as if he could be seen through the floorboards. 

"Hey, he's going to wake up and we're going to save the world…" Toilyn's gaze took its place alongside mine on the ceiling.

"What do you think they did to him?" 

She moved as if she was going to shrug, but thought better of it. "Have you considered that whatever happened to Jan, Luminous knew it had to happen?"

Yes. No matter how much I didn't want to absorb the suspicion, I couldn't shake the feeling. Aloud: "But what?"

She rested her elbows on her knees. "The tech."

"What about it?"

"If Bateman's assignment was to watch Jan, Luminous had to know that Noir would eventually get interested in him."

"The remote, Toy. We already knew that."

"What if Noir's motivations were about his remote, but Luminous' are about the rest of it?"

She had my attention now. "He can't do anything else."

"Oh yes he can." She nodded thoughtfully. "Remember how his chest had all that dried up blood with no marks?" She crossed a line on her chest. Two more before: "He can heal himself. All of this has to have something to do with that tech."

"Altura!" I sat straight up excitedly. "When Gillian cornered me in her office, she said that my meddling turned two assignments into one."

She mumbled something.

"Huh? What?"

She jumped up and started pacing back and forth around the coffee table. On her seventh rotation, she snapped her fingers triumphantly.

"Care to share with the rest of the congregation?" 

"Him! Jan!"

Oh, well that explains everything… "Him, Jan… What?" 

"I think…" She clapped her hands. "No, I'm almost certain. Jan's the cure." 

"That would mean Luminous knew he needed to be captured by Noir for his tech to… I don't know. Whatever they did to him." 

"Whatever it takes." Only the voice wasn't coming from either of us. Coming down the stairs, slowly, slowly… Almost as if she was floating, was the last face I expected to see: Juniper. "Z…" She greeted as her boot lifted from the final stair. "Toylin…" Inside the corridors of Luminous, her essence always carried a familiar air, almost as if she was meant to be there, but here… Here inside our “safe house” she seemed out of place, otherworldly even; reminding me that she always was, we’d just somehow forgotten. Juniper just was and at that moment, she was outside the library, where we’d never seen. Where she didn’t belong.  

Turquoise and purple waves of hair swayed from side to side as she glided around the couch. She came to a stop beside Toilyn, whose mouth was now hanging open. 

"Are you planning on catching flies in that thing?" She smiled, though the humor didn't quite touch the glassiness of her white eyes. She waved at the couch behind them. "Shall we sit?"

Toilyn didn't relax until Juniper had already taken a seat and even then, she took her place apprehensively. 

"Don’t you have some books to file?" 

"Gillian thought it best if I come." 

"Toilyn's right, isn't she?" I questioned. There was no need for pleasantries, only honesty.

"For the most part." Juniper's voice swirled through the room, brushing every surface like a feather. 

Toilyn gritted her teeth. "Luminous knew then. Luminous knew the whole time." 

"I knew." Juniper said quietly.

"You're Luminous!" I snapped. 

Juniper's head jerked up at the harshness in my voice. "Not everything that exists within those walls is Luminous." She paused as if contemplating her words. She nodded though neither Toilyn nor I had uttered a sound. "I saved your job all those years ago."

She didn't go into specifics but then again, it wasn't needed. The trimmers of Brie's ghost never left the deepest caverns of my subconscious. No matter the lengths I took to cast her out, she would always be there, lying in wait.

"Gillian was going to terminate you, but I couldn't allow that to happen. I knew in order for the timeline to be spared, you had to exist." Juniper continued. 

"Then why were they trying to take her off the case?!" Toilyn demanded. 

"Because I told her you needed to believe nobody would go after him." 

"Wait… What?" I didn't like how any of this sounded. They used me… Us. They used us. "You tricked me!"

"I knew Toilyn wouldn't let you go after him alone, yes." Again, Juniper's head was nodding and again, I didn't like what was falling from her face.

"We could have died!" Toilyn exclaimed, jumping to her feet. I knew that fiery burning in her gaze all too well. She was already flexing her fingers.

"I knew because of her bond with Jan…"

"Who?! Not me!" Juniper was one wrong syllable away from Toilyn's fist connecting with every body part they felt like pummeling. 

"No. Not you." If Juniper was worried in any way about Toilyn, her poker face was unclockable. "You."

"We don't have a-"

Her hand was up, swatting my protests away. "I knew you wouldn't stop until you had him back."

"No, stop trying to pretty this up, Juniper. Luminous sacrificed us." Toilyn said angrily. "Nine times out of ten, since Z had broken law before, Gillian had no problem sending her in there with no back up. In her eyes, Z is expendable."

"You were there." Juniper stated matter of factly. "As I knew you would be."

"Only me!" Toilyn's fists were shaking now. "That means in your eyes, I'm expendable too!"

"And yet, you made sure she made it out." Her face still a mask of tranquility, she glanced up at Toilyn. "As I knew you would."

"I'm going to check on Jan before I do something I won't regret." Toilyn turned on her heels and stomped away from the living room. She continued to stomp each and every step until she was at the top. 

"Are you angry with me too?"

Yes. Aloud: "No, I'm confused. When I was at the library… Juniper, you spoke to me." Something clicked. "Wait a second, when I came to you for advice, were you just keeping me distracted?"

"He had to open the letter." That wasn't an admission, but all the same, it spoke volumes. 

"But the wreck, his assistant, none of it was his fault."

Glassy white eyes cascaded through the betrayal in my expression. "He needed to believe it was." She blinked once. Twice. "Had he not humbled himself, neither you nor Toilyn would be alive. Opening that letter set into motion the man who protected the both of you." She stood. "I'm not apologetic in any way if that's what you're seeking. He's the cure. One man can save millions of lives in this timeline."

"But what about us, Juniper? What about me? I thought… I thought we were friends. Wait… Where are you going?"

Her tiny feet were almost at the stairs, as if I wasn't questioning every conversation that had ever passed between us. Light illuminated the curtains, allowing sunlight to peek through as the sun rose. The shroud of what was left of night had slowly fallen away during our conversation, giving way to the fourth day. "He's about to wake up." Her hand on the banister, Juniper paused to look at me. "My silence gave him the push he needed to protect you." Even with the distance, I could tell that I'd hurt her somehow. Oh, the irony! She allowed Luminous to use us for a suicide mission and somehow I was being offensive. Before I could raise this point, she continued: "Don't ever question my love for you, Z. We are friends."

 

******

I had no concept of time. It could have been hours, possibly days. For however long, when I regained consciousness, my wrists were bound above my head. Some type of conversation was always happening around me. How frazzled it sounded, they were determined for me to wake up. Whoever "they" were. 

I had no idea when someone had graciously relieved me of my shirt, but I was reminded to thank them every time that sliver of leather lashed across my bare chest. Sometimes it was needles. I had overheard them mentioning they were attempting to synthesize the pills in my utility belt. From what I could gather with strained hearing, they were shooting me up with it like I was some kind of a fiend. Though their curiosity was keeping me alive, something about the revelation didn't sit right with me.

One thing I was careful to make note of was how I was hardly ever alone. There was always the sound of shoes in the room, except when those shoes were boots. Somehow I knew the boots were more important. They carried a different kind of weight. 

Female weight, I'd theorized by the aroma of perfume wafting towards my nostrils whenever she was near. 

Another day had come to a close, or so I'd told myself. 

Again, I could hear boots. Step. Step. Step. The same steps I had been listening to for the longest, but dared not lift my head. If she knows you’re awake, she’ll come over here. I warned myself. Somehow I knew this to be true. Though I willed myself to remain statuesque, the silent chant meant absolutely nothing to her. The more I mentally begged her not to, the closer she came until I could feel the warmth of her breath tickling my skin. I resisted the urge to jerk away as she ran her fingers along an already healed lash across my stomach.

“I know you’re awake.” Her words were like a fist punching through my chest to grip my heart. Almost instantly, it started to beat faster. “I can see the sweat beading on your brow.” I couldn’t help but wonder if she could smell the terror seeping from my pores. She backed up a few inches. I couldn’t see her, but I was still aware of her presence. Whenever anyone else was with me, they paid the doors no mind. Everything about her felt different, right down to how she vacated the room. She was always careful to close the door behind herself. 

“Do you know where you are?” From the sound of it, she was further away now. A lot further. Good.

Don’t open your eyes… Don’t open your eyes… The last thing I remembered was saving Toilyn's life. After that, my entire existence was a blur.  Time seemed to pass slowly yet, I was aware the world was ambling along without me. I had no idea how long my hands had been roped to that ceiling, but I knew it had been forever since I was near a friendly face. Z… Toilyn… Were they alive?... And if they were, were they elsewhere in a similar predicament? 

Through the slits that I would chance here and there, I could tell I was in a lab of sorts. I had no idea who she was, but I could make out a hazy view of the boots I'd come to memorize. They were a deep, leathery brown. Above those, she was wearing a black jumper. Swaying in the small of her back was a long, sleek, black braid. Her hand was hovering over a metal table, in deep thought. Finally she selected a syringe. She flicked the needle before holding it up to the light.

When I first awoke, because she was always alone, I thought I'd imagined myself a companion. A few days later, maybe she was a ghost. (Or maybe I was hyping up my thoughts to override my common sense.) Either way, neither was not the case. The hands I was watching were of a darker complexion. Definitely real, definitely alive. 

"Dax!"

I knew that name. This was bad. A separate set of boots shuffled into the lab. I barely had enough time to reclose my eyes. 

"You screamed?"

"Funny." She didn't sound like it was hilarious in the slightest. "Did you find Dr. Patil?"

"Yes. I disposed of him. We caught up to the wife, but we're unable to locate the kids."

"Forget the kids. A man is more likely to spill his guts to the woman of the house. Not the babies."

"Suri…"

Suri. Did I say bad? I was mistaken. This was the stuff of nightmares. "Going by your tone, I can tell I'm not going to like what you're about to say next." I could hear movement. Possibly her turning to face him. "Let me guess: Your team didn't locate the blueprint." 

His reply was inaudible, but her "Dammit, Dax!" was not. "How could you have been so careless in the first place?!" The sound of a slap resonated through the room. "Find them!"

"Suri…"

"Don't Suri me…" She mimicked his tone flawlessly. "Do you realize what your stupidity may have cost us?!"

"Stupidity? Need I remind you that you were the one who insisted upon toting them to the college? Why were they on you in the first place?"

Sounds of a struggle, at first. Those merged into ones of a different kind of connection. Were they really… Yep, no mistaking that sound. They were full on making out like I wasn't hanging just a few feet away. Ugh… Dax and Suri… Ew. Just wait 'til I tell Z. Mentally, I sighed. If I live that long.

"You worry too much." Dax's voice whispered into what I imagined were a pair of lustful eyes attached to a sadist. 

"We almost didn't grab him!" I was ninety-six percent certain the "him" in question was me. "If we're going to crush Luminous once and for all, there can be no more mistakes." 

"There won't be. Let me handle this." 

A few days later, or nights, or whenever, for some reason, I could tell something had happened. I didn’t feel any different as they bustled about me, but I knew something wasn’t the same as it had been. For one, though movement in the room always felt unsure and rushed, this felt more grave, as if they were trying to move onto something else. I waited just in case someone decided to double back. Finally, I couldn’t take the suspense any longer. I opened my eyes to a tiny slit. I looked down at my torso. It appeared no different than the last time I’d seen it. Whenever that was. Bruised but nonetheless, healed. I studied my pants then chanced a look at my arms. Both sets were filthy but at least I wasn't just a Christmas ornament in my boxers. For all intents and purposes, I was relatively unharmed. I was so busy scrutinizing my limbs that I didn’t hear the footsteps at the door. The knob turned slowly, catching my attention.

I barely had time for my eyes to slam close before Suri burst into the room: “Wake up!” She slapped me. It stung, but with all the practice of staying motionless, I had enough common sense to not react. She did it again.

"I know you're awake!" She pressed my cheeks between either of her fingers, hard. "All we needed was your tech!"

She shoved me away from her. I could make out the sounds of her pacing back and forth. "If they're here, (Somebody's here!) there has to be more to you than that stupid remote." She jabbed a finger at my chest. "Marlo!"

"Yes ma'am?" 

"Get the defibrillator."

"Ma'am? Why?"

"If he wants to pretend to be a corpse, perhaps we should treat him as such."

"Ma'am?"

"If you ma'am me one more time… Get the defibrillator, Marlo!"

Instantly, all pretenses drained from me. My heart began to race; threatening to tear its way out of my chest. I struggled against the restraints.

Suri grabbed me once more. "I knew you were awake." She sneered though I had yet to open my eyes. I didn't know what was about to happen, but my knowledge of defibrillators was enough to know I didn't want to watch it happen.

I could hear the door opening again. "Shiloh, where's Marlo?" 

"Suri, you can't do this." Came the response. "This is Dax. This isn't you."

"I don't know why you're even here. Where is your idiotic brother?! He's such a waste. I don't know why you insist on keeping him around." Suri snapped.

"The same reason you've obviously forgotten about." I heard whoever Shiloh was, murmuring. 

"What did you just say?"

"N-Nothing." Came the hasty response. "That's right. Now, bring me the damn defibrillator!"

"Suri…"

"Now Shiloh or you'll be the next thing I hang from this ceiling!"

There was a short silence. A set of nails raked my torso, a small warning that Suri was still present. I could hear the door reopening. Three words, full of reluctance, filled my ears: "Plug it in.

Please… There was enough hesitation for me to scrape together a little hope. All of it dissolved under Shiloh's sigh of resignation. "Just turn this dial and when you're ready…"

"I know how to use it!" The sounds of what I assumed was Suri snatching the paddles from Shiloh prickled my eyelashes. "Get out!"

"Are you sure?"

"I want that damn tech!"

The cool touch of metal caressed my skin. I yerked away from the invasion. "All you have to do is tell me what I want to know." When there was no response, she tiptoed so close to me that I could smell what she had for lunch on her breath. "Fine then."

There was no need to shout "Clear!" This wasn't a medical drama. 

I couldn't keep my eyes closed any longer. Every piece of me felt like it was on fire. A scream ripped from my vocal cords. I thought I knew every sound that my body could ever produce, but no. Pain tore from every part of me and there was nothing I could do. 

Her laughing face warped into an expression of pain. She clapped her hands over her ears. “Stop it!” She shrieked.

Blue began to tear from my feet. It started as a slow burn, at the tips of my toes before crawling up my legs. I attempted to close my mind off from the pain, but it rippled from me anyway. I was a slave to the throbbing agony.

“Stop it!” She was screaming now. Our screams mingled in the middle of the floor. The blue was now curling from the tips of my fingers. It poured uncontrollably from me. She tried to scramble from the room but the glow had all but blinded her.  She clambered to a wall in order to feel her way out.

"Shiloh?!" She steadied herself on a piece of railing. "Dammit, Shiloh?!" I could still make out her screeching for Shiloh as she frantically pulled herself through the door.

Toilyn… Z... 

There was a time where I imagined our paths crossing again. Were these my last moments, I didn't want to waste them crippled with torment. I wanted to think of better times, better scenery. I wanted to remember how Toilyn's nose would scrunch up right before she said something sarcastic or how Z would smile at nothing in particular when she thought nobody was watching. I wanted to embrace them. No, cling… I was clinging to them. Neither of them liked me much, but they were friends… My friends…

And I loved them.

My lips parted, releasing the only sound that meant anything to me: “Z...”

And then, the world went dark. 

 

Epilogue: Agents Of Farewell...

"I figured I had to be dead cuz-" He made a motion at Toilyn. "This one hugged me when I sat up. What sucks is now I'm sure of it 'cause you're here." He nodded at Juniper. "I never imagined you to be a part of my Hell loop and yet, here you are."

I wanted… No, NEED… I needed to be the one to tell him. "You're not dead, Jan." His gaze swung from Juniper to me. Our eyes locked and in that moment, none of it mattered. He was here, alive. The entire room melted away as I rushed to his side. He gathered me in his arms as if we'd always been this way. 

I clung to the fabric of his shirt, willing my cheeks to remain dry. There was no time for tears. I would not cry.

"Get a room." The dry humor of Toilyn's voice tickled my ears, reminding me of where we were… Of who I was.

I released Jan immediately. 

"So where are we?" 

I stood, grateful for the subject change. "This used to be Dr. Patil's home." Juniper explained before Toilyn or I could respond. "Who's apparently dead now, according to your story." 

"I told you guys everything I could remember." Jan said quickly. 

Juniper nudged my shoulder. Just a little longer. My heart pleaded. Can't we just be in this moment for a little while longer… 

I moved so that she could get closer to Jan. "You're going to save the timeline, Jan." 

"There's no way!" He burst out laughing. His laughter sobered as he realized none of us had cracked so much as a smile. "Wait, you're serious?"

"I am." She replied, nodding. "The technology that you created will save the lives of the doctors at Altura who are working on Covid-99 so that Luminous can remove them from this timeline."

"Doesn't that mean it'll still happen in 2019?"

She nodded somberly. "It has to. It's a historic event. We cannot alter historic events in any way, that's the rules."

"But the people…" I said. "Millions…"

Again, Juniper nodded. "Removing the virus from this era will mean the doctors, nurses and scientists who are tasked to be on the front lines will go on to do those things. Without this reset, the team who goes on to figure it out will parish." 

"All of them?" Toilyn asked, her voice cracked with disbelief. 

She didn't even hesitate. "Yes."

"If Jan is the cure, why not place him in 2019 before any of this happens?"

"You already know that answer, Toilyn." Juniper said. She turned her attention, first to Jan, then to me. "I will give you two a little time then we have to go."

She gestured at Toilyn, whose neck was still locked on Jan. For a few seconds, I could see the turmoil in her expression. Juniper reached to grab her elbow, but Toilyn snatched out of reach. She was out the door, stomping down the stairs before Juniper could react. She chanced one last look at me, then Jan: "Five minutes." 

"You saved my life." Jan said as soon as the door closed behind her. 

"You saved me first." All of a sudden, my throat felt extremely dry. "When I found you… I thought…"

"I thought the same." He began to fiddle with the blanket covering his legs. "Ya know, when you're a kid, screaming with laughter is something you become accustomed to. It's just a sound and you would think all your screams would sound similar no matter how you age, but that's not true. I don't think I'll ever be able to shake the sounds of my screams in that lab." 

"Jan…" Look at me! My thoughts screamed. He wouldn't. His gaze stayed on his fingers tracing lines on the blanket. "I've got something for you." 

When he still didn't look up, I fished through my pockets to find the picture of him. I slid it in front of him. He picked it up. Once, twice, he turned it over; almost as if he didn't recognize the people. "It's Mavis." He murmured finally. "Where did you get this?" 

I explained as much as I could, without getting into my suspicions. The tips of his fingers were trembling on the edges. I wished that he would look at me, but no. His eyes remained on the picture. "She didn't die because of me." The words were weaved with an undertone of relief. "It wasn't my fault." 

"No." I replied.

"You went through a lot to find me."

"I did."

"Z…" Blue eyes fell on me finally. It was mere seconds but it might as well have been hours. I would have given anything to be a mind reader in that moment. "And now I'm supposed to save the timeline." His words were quiet, as if he'd meant to say something else, but changed his mind. He flipped his hand over. A tiny ball of blue and gold fluttered from his fingers. It did tiny pirouettes down the bed before disappearing through the wall. "I need to know…" He punched the bed angrily. "This wasn't supposed to happen to me! I could have taken that dude and I know it! They caught me with my guard down and I have to live with that!" He punched the blanket again. "I'm going to kill that guy one day."

"Get in line." 

"There's a line?" A tiny smile swept his lips. "Will I ever see you again?" 

"Of course." I answered at the same time as Juniper's tiny knocks signaled the end of our time. 

I turned on my boot. Jan's hand shot out to grab my wrist. I looked down at his fingers wrapped around my naked skin. I'd never noticed how lithe and artistic they were. My eyes studied the tips of his fingernails, which still had a bit of dirt beneath them. Unlike me, he had not bitten his nails down to nubs. 

"Jan…"

Our eyes met. 

He smiled.

I smiled.

For a few fleeting moments, that's all that mattered.